On the outside, most folks might peg me as "Mr. Sunshine." My infectious laugh often fills rooms, and my face seems to have a permanent reservation for a grin. But beneath that exterior of a perpetually happy guy, I've had my dance with the moody blues of acute anxiety, tangos with the gray clouds of depression and a toxic relationship to clonazepam.
Funny thing about life, it rarely gives you a manual titled "How to Be Perpetually Happy" (believe me, I've checked all major bookstores), although there is one that might be the closest thing to it "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck".
In my personal quest to crack the happiness code, I've become a self-proclaimed philosopher and psychologist. Dive deep into the philosophy of happiness? Check. Dissect the psychology of joy? Double check. And in my earnest (and sometimes clumsy) exploration of what it means to truly be happy, I've stumbled upon an intriguing idea: maybe happiness isn't a shiny medal waiting at the end of a marathon but the wind in your hair (just an analogy I'm bald as a cue ball), the stitches in your side, and the crazy, uneven terrain you navigate along the way.
Surprisingly, this revelation didn't come to me during a soul-searching retreat in the Himalayas or a deep meditation session beside a babbling brook. Instead, it hit me during the mundane — in the midst of a particularly grueling morning commute, or while untangling a stubborn knot in my shoelaces. It's in these unassuming moments I realized the constant chase for a 'happily ever after' can make us overlook the 'happy right nows.' Every time I took a step back to laugh at my own missteps or appreciate the small triumphs, I found pockets of joy tucked away. I began to question the popular narrative: What if the world's got it backward? What if it's not about the grand crescendo but the notes that build up to it? And with this newfound perspective, my journey of understanding happiness took a delightful, unexpected detour.
Historical and Philosophical Perspectives
Throughout history, some of the greatest minds have grappled with the concept of happiness. Their musings, teachings, and ideologies hint at the profound value of the journey rather than the end goal.
- The Stoics: Ancient Stoicism, with its roots in Greece and Rome, always emphasized the present moment. Thinkers like Seneca and Marcus Aurelius often talked about the importance of accepting the present and finding contentment in it. Aurelius once said, "Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking." It wasn't about achieving grand milestones, but about cherishing the here and now.
- The Taoists: Lao Tzu, the founder of Taoism, encapsulated the essence of the journey in his seminal work, the Tao Te Ching. "A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving." The emphasis? The flow of life, the path one treads, and the beauty of the unfolding journey.
- The Buddhists: Buddhism talks about the Middle Way and the path to enlightenment. It isn't about the end realization but the steps, practices, and understandings one gains while walking the path. The joy is in the seeking, in the understanding, in the practice.
- Western Philosophers: Even in the West, philosophers like Søren Kierkegaard or Friedrich Nietzsche have touched upon life's journey and the experiences that shape our understanding of happiness. Nietzsche once remarked, "To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering." It's not about evading challenges but about embracing and growing from them.
Looking at these perspectives, it becomes clear that our modern obsession with "arriving" might be a bit misguided. For centuries, the wise have found solace not in the destination, but in the beauty, understanding, and growth the journey offers.
Scientific Backing: The Psychology Behind the Journey
We live in an age where numbers often speak louder than words. So, what does science say about our journey versus the destination quandary?
- Dopamine and Anticipation: Dopamine, our brain's "feel good" neurotransmitter, doesn't just spike when we win; it dances in anticipation. A study from Nature Neuroscience showed that dopamine surges not just during rewards but significantly during the anticipation of them. Our brain, it seems, celebrates the chase almost as much as the catch.
- Goal Pursuit and Well-being: Pursuing a goal, even if it remains elusive, has its rewards. According to a research in the Journal of Happiness Studies, chasing intrinsic goals related to personal growth elevates our well-being. It's the striving that brings joy, not just the achievement.
- The Hedonic Treadmill: Ever noticed how quickly we adjust to our circumstances, good or bad? This phenomenon, known as the Hedonic Treadmill, asserts that our happiness levels tend to revert to a personal baseline. Big wins give a momentary high, but it's the journey and adaptation that offer lasting contentment.
- Flow State: Immersion or "flow" in an activity, where the world fades, and we're engrossed in the moment, is a treasure trove of happiness. Mihály Csíkszentmihályi, who coined the term, found that this state emerges during the doing, not the completing.
In essence, science, just like our historical philosophers, champions the journey as a critical reservoir of our happiness. Those victory laps? Think of them as delightful pit stops along the way.
The Paradox of Modern Achievement: The Elusive Joy at the Finish Line
In our fast-paced, achievement-driven world, a sense of emptiness can sometimes shadow our accomplishments. A recent study from the American Psychological Association showed that people overestimate the happiness new achievements bring, leading to an unexpected void.
- The Fleeting High: Achievements, like landing that dream job or traveling to an exotic destination, bring joy. However, as the study suggests, we often overestimate the longevity of this happiness, pushing us towards the next goal in hopes of recapturing it.
- The "More & Next" Trap: In a digital age where every success is broadcasted on platforms like Instagram and Facebook, there's an amplified pressure to chase the "next." This endless loop can create a feeling of never being "enough."
- Seeking Depth: Surface wins often lack the depth that enriching experiences bring. Think about it — isn't the essence of a travel experience more about the culture, the misadventures, and the people, rather than just a check on a bucket list?
- Pursuit of Meaning: Viktor Frankl, in his profound book, "Man's Search for Meaning," emphasizes our deep-seated need for meaning. While achievements can be fulfilling, true satisfaction often lies in the challenges faced, the connections forged, and the personal growth attained.
Remember, every accolade is but a chapter in the intricate tapestry of life. It's the threads, the colors, the patterns — the journey — that create the masterpiece.
Happiness Decoded: The Science Behind Those Good Vibes
Alright, folks, it's science time! But fear not, this won't be a snooze fest. We're diving deep into the realm of happiness, minus the technical jargon.
- Dopamine — The "High Five" Neurotransmitter: Recognize that buzz when you hit a milestone or receive praise? That's dopamine doing a victory lap in your brain. A study found that dopamine plays a crucial role in goal-oriented behavior. Yet, it's transient — like the fleeting joy of a short-lived Instagram trend.
- Serotonin — The "All's Well" Molecule: This neurotransmitter has long been linked to well-being. In fact, serotonin levels can influence our mood so significantly that many antidepressants aim to boost its production. It's the inner peace you feel during quiet reflection or a serene morning.
- Oxytocin — The "Group Hug" Hormone: Oxytocin is all about connection. Released during moments of closeness, this hormone cements social bonds. Think of it as the warmth during heartfelt conversations or reunions.
- Endorphin — The "Natural High" Molecule: Best known for the "runner's high", endorphins act as natural painkillers. Ever laughed so hard that you forgot your worries? Yep, that's endorphins working their magic.
Interestingly, while achievements mainly trigger dopamine, the journey — with its ups and downs, camaraderies, and insights — often stimulates a mix of serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins. It's not just about the finish line; the race itself is a whirlwind of emotions and growth.
Happiness isn't a one-note tune; it's a symphony of chemicals, experiences, and connections. Let's embrace the whole concert, not just the final note.
Embracing the Uncertainty: Why Life's Unpredictability Might Be Your Best Ally
Did you know our brains, evolutionarily speaking, have a penchant for predictability? It's true. A study from the University College London showed that the brain has a stronger response to predictable rewards than to unexpected ones. But as most of us have discerned (especially if you've ever tried decoding a cryptic text message), life loves its curveballs.
- The Illusion of Control: We love to think we're the masters of our universe. Reality check? Control is more of an idea than a constant. It's like believing your heated debate with the GPS will change its directions. Often, those unplanned rain showers lead to the most spontaneous adventures.
- The Growth in the Unknown: Every curve, twist, or unexpected stop on our path has something to teach us. Whether it's resilience, adaptability, or a newfound passion, uncertainty is life's unconventional classroom.
- The Excitement Factor: A predictable life can verge on monotonous. Uncertainty adds drama, anticipation, and the thrill of the "what's next?" Imagine reading a book where you already know the ending. Where's the fun in that?
- Savoring the Now: With no guarantees of the future, we're nudged to embrace the present fully. To cherish every giggle, every challenge, every fleeting moment. Being present is more than a buzzword; it's a way of life.
So, when life goes off script (and trust me, it will), relish the plot twists. Because sometimes, the unplanned chapters are the ones we remember most fondly.
TL;DR (Too Long; Didn't Read)
- Misconceptions of Happiness: Looks can be deceiving; the pursuit of genuine happiness goes beyond surface-level contentment.
- The Philosophy and Science of Joy: Achieving a goal brings happiness, but the process of chasing it brings even more fulfillment and personal growth.
- The Endless Quest: We're hardwired to chase goals. Every accomplishment leads us to set new benchmarks, fuelling an endless loop of pursuits.
- Personal Stories of Persistence: Every scar, wrinkle, and laugh line is a testament to the beautiful, messy journey of chasing our dreams.
- The Power of Support: Building a dream takes a village. Surrounding ourselves with positive influences amplifies our chances of success.
- Embracing the Uncertainty: Life's unpredictability isn't a bug, it's a feature. The unexpected moments often make the most memorable tales.
In a nutshell, it's not just the mountaintop moments that bring joy, but every step, stumble, and detour on the journey there. Happiness is found not just in the destination but in the art of pursuit.
"It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace." — Chuck Palahniuk
Alejandro G. Rangel | Life Long Learning | 🇲🇽🇺🇲 Citizen of the world