As I sit at home waiting for my new job to start, I realise something — my mental health is better than ever. It doesn't seem right because you're supposed to be unhappy when you're not working, right?

I like to work and I'm not fussed by having to get my hands dirty to solve a problem, so it's not that. So what is it? Oh, yeah it's the work environment. I hate the work environments and my mental health is better whilst I'm not in one. It's a break from getting singled out, lied on and harassed.

I've had nothing but time to work on my own business, work out, and masturbate, and boy it feels good. This is what life is about. But it can't last forever so I have to think about where I'm going to live and work in the short term whilst I build my business.

Being black means that you have to make mindful decisions that other people take for granted. I can't live anywhere as the town might be racist and I can't work anywhere for the same reasons. I've tried it and no matter what resistance you put up, if the locals don't want you there they will force you out.

I don't want my entire life to be a fight for a basic life so I'll move around until I find something that works. Maybe I should start thinking outside of the box.

It's not something I should have to think about so much

It's something I've been thinking about for over a decade and I've experimented a lot and I've found out where I can live at least. But the fact it's been such a difficult decision is disappointing, and so is the reality that there are so many places I can't live.

I have to live in a cosmopolitan city to be happy or the only way I can survive is if I switch off my mind to the fact that I'm black and pretend I don't see racism. I can't do that so I had to find a place filled with POC who won't torture me for the colour of my skin.

When it comes to work I'm still well and truly looking. White people are happiest when black people are in roles that serve them as we should be below them in their eyes. They treat us like the people from developing countries when they go on holiday.

We have to serve them with a smile as well because we should be honoured and lucky to be in such a position. "Yes Mr White Man, coming right up".

I'm not below these guys and neither are any other black people except Candice Owens. Get used to working alongside me as I am just as capable as you are, I also come without attitude problems.

I can be a lesson for future generations

Before I die I'm going to reveal my identity so everyone can see who this blog was written by and get more context. Future generations can look at the story of a black man who tried to live a normal life in the UK, and it was so hard he had to go above and beyond and create the greatest company of all time. What a story.

British people were so racist they forced a guy into greatness like the Americans did with Malcolm X. Except that actually happened.

All of my struggles can be used to pass wisdom on to the next generation, and that's part of the reason why I write.

For all the black people who are misunderstood and the black people who are constantly gaslighted on a daily basis into thinking they're bad for simply being black.

For all the black people who are scared of being black as they think they'll get a lashing from white people. It does happen, verbally.

You don't have to forget your culture, you don't have to speak a certain way, and you don't have to date overweight white people to fit in.

To any black people reading this and wondering if life is worth it, I'm here to say yes, it is. You may not think you're making the impact you think you are, but your story only has to resonate with 1 person and that person may go on to do great things — or at least avoid the pitfalls you fell into.

As morbid as this sounds, even a life of nothing but struggle that ends in tragedy is worth it, and many of you are struggling way more than me.

Entrepreneurship and possibly another move

Yes, I've been considering another move, but it's not because I don't like it where I am, I actually appreciate it a lot. It's because it might help my business. Taking entrepreneurship seriously is making me consider things like employees and store locations.

Before I only considered where to live and work based on where I could survive. Now I need to think seriously about how I'm going to be a successful business owner.

I don't want a fully remote business forever, at some point I want a store. I want the best and brightest but I'm not sure that Birmingham has that, some of the people I've met here struggle at simple things, but it's early days.

I also need people who reflect my brand and sustainable fitness doesn't really fit in with the UK vibe. The UK vibe is confused anger, that's why pubs do so well here. Hopefully, I can encourage the people here to put down the TV remote and stop clogging up the NHS by not clogging up their arteries.